*Note: This entry was originally written back in 2016. But sadly, these issues are still prevalent today. I hope my thoughts resonate with you. Enjoy.
To my Black Kings and Queens,
Even though I know how cruel the world can be, it still surprises me every time I witness hate. I guess I have such a big heart that I forget that some people are actually afraid of love.
Whenever I leave my home, I drive around happy with my music on, singing like I should've had a record deal years ago! However, all of that goes out of the window as soon as I see any police car drive by. I hate the fact that my anxiety comes on like a light switch at the site of law enforcement. I hate the fact that I have to swallow my pride in case I get pulled over for anything; just so that I can make it home alive.
But does this mean that all officers are out to get me? No. It's so unfortunate that we've grown to fear and hate a system that's supposed to protect and serve. But is their failure to protect and serve our fault? Absolutely not. The same situation applies when having friends from another race. There are so many good people all around us, no matter their race or ethnicity. If I have a Caucasian friend, but that individual has another friend or family member that's racist, does that make my friend a racist? Really think about that question for a second.
Everyone comes from different backgrounds, and everyone is raised in different homes with different values. The beauty in maturity is that you finally have the ability to put that crown on, sit on your own throne, and realize your own beliefs. So, what feels right to you? Not your friends, not your parents, YOU. I refuse to walk around constantly with fear and hate in my heart. That will only make me fear life itself, and that my loves, is no way to live.
Today I walked on campus and saw that a white man was looking directly at me. At first glance, I felt like he was looking at me with disgust. But, to be honest, he could've just been looking. Hey, I'm beautiful! If I were him, I'd look at me too! Even if he were looking at me with disgust, I'm okay with that. You know why? Because I never take off my crown. I look at myself in the mirror everyday and see gold glistening off of my sweet, brown, glowing skin. When's the last time you really admired yourself in the mirror? Take some time to do that every once in a while. And oh, don't forget that crown.
Your Beautiful Black Queen